Midnight Girl

by Marlana Edwards

Midnight is the darkest time of night
When the stars look like miniature suns because of the contrast against the pitch black expanse of the sky

I am a midnight girl
I have skin like pools of milk chocolate
An abundance of hair like onyx wool
Bright eyes like diamonds in a coal mine

Being a midnight girl is not good enough; it never has been
Rappers rap about yellow bones and red bones, but never midnight girls
So boys find beauty in yellow bones and red bones, but never midnight girls

I’ve heard boys say ‘I don’t like dark skinned girls’
And those words shatter my self esteem every time
And they smash a part of me into a million tiny pieces of raw inadequacy.

I am familiar with the plight of midnight girls of all races with abuelitas and tias who say things like “mija, no necesitas ir afuera hoy, porque hace sol y ya estas una negrita.”

Which translates roughly to “Baby girl, you don’t need to go outside today because it’s sunny, and you’re already a little blackie”

Darts thrown by those closest to you pierce deeper than darts thrown by anyone else

I feel the pain of midnight girls whose hearts and souls are penetrated and lacerated almost every day by comments like “you’re actually pretty for a dark skinned girl’ and ‘if you were lighter, I would date you.”

These comments are like accidental bullets shot in ignorance
But these bullets still kill, despite the shooters’ intentions

I was one of those midnight girls who believed that darkness was associated with sin and filth and ugliness

I used to think that midnight was the time of night where the sun- the light- was absent
But I don’t think that any more

I can see now that at midnight, the sun isn’t really absent
At midnight, the richness of the sky simply overpowers the sun
– making it only appear to be absent

At midnight, the darkness accentuates the smallest stars in our galaxy, while shadowing the brightest most powerful star.

There is a word for midnight in every language;

Media noche in Latin America

noss leil in the Arab world,

Minut in France

Not every nation has a word for 12:01 am and 11:59 pm
But there’s always a word for midnight.

The world fails to realize that midnight is beautiful

Hence the profits made from
Skin bleaching creams in Asia
Ambi cream in he US
Skin lightening sun block in Latin America

People of color from every nation suffer from a type of Stockholm’s syndrome
It causes them to want to look like their captors, their conquerors

Black, red, brown and yellow people across the nations fail to recall that before God created light, there was darkness, and midnight.

*2014 Colorism Poetry Contest Division 2 Winner

rebecca jimenez 2014 Colorism Poetry ContestAbout the Poet: Marlana Edwards was born in New York City on February 10th, 1996, but she moved to a small town outside of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania at the age of seven. Marlana joined the Philadelphia Youth Poetry movement in December 2013, and she developed a passion for writing about global race issues. Marlana has written a series of poems about institutionalized racism, Colorism, and the cycle of racial hate. Marlana graduated from the Baldwin School on June 5th, 2014 and she is currently writing a book about her experiences as an African American student at a predominantly Caucasian, private school. Marlana will be attending Howard University in August and she plans to double major in journalism and political science.


 

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